MESS_five minute friday

When Not Perfect- Not Spotless Feels Like Broken & Scattered

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Cleaning In A Blur Of Emotions

Mess.

Just the utterance of the word conjures up the visions and emotions of out-of-control:

a great glaring problem to be embarrassed about and immediately fixed.

This passed Wednesday my house was most certainly, room by room, a mess.

I was frazzled from a long day and with nerves stretched tight

so I chose to get loss in some blog writing

let my ten and twelve year old make mac and cheese {with gasp, white enriched pasta and not a trace of vegetables to be seen!} for dinner.

Because I know, know, know through repeated folly and madness that when I tackle a mess, in response to that rising panic in my chest that vapor of panic escapes out through a well- honed tongue of complaining

that whips itself into a frenzy of anger.

After our dinner of gobs and gobs of cheese with pasta bow ties that I had seconds of,

I took my glass of wine and The Babe to the comforts of our old den couch-

the one we got for free and has large ghastly flowers in that ’80s scheme of color and design-

and did the “birdy game”.

It is what we used to do for hours when she was still small and weighed quite a bit less, where I stick my legs straight up laying down, grab her outstretched hands, and in a quick swoop pull her leaping gleeful body onto my own feet, and then hoist her up with her belly resting on my feet.

Of course the “birdy” comes into perilous weather rather quickly and has to do a crash landing

{we like violent games}

Somehow, between crash landings, our conversation drifted into yoga moves she does in her pre-k class and we pushed the coffee table back and did some together on our area rug-

the one that my second born decided to decorate with pastel chalk, that never quite wore off; with bits and nubs of food crumbs poking into my hands with each “downward dog”

and I HATE that feeling

However, oddly, my frustration of earlier went down and my enjoyment went up.

Confession:

Later, I did vacuum the entire downstairs,

dude, it was gross

but without gritting teeth and swearing just low enough not to be heard over the hum of the vacuum.

My messy house and the feelings of panic it often causes will never leave-

my thorn in the flesh if you will-

but the joy of living in the mess, despite the mess perhaps, has become my battle cry I will myself to proclaim

and it resonates with the Holy Scripture given to comfort the Apostle Paul concerning his thorn in the flesh-

My Grace Is Sufficient For Thee

Stop.

Its Friday!

That means our relaxed day of home schooling, the backpacks can get thrown in the closet and forgotten about till Monday morning, dinner will be a leisurely affair with wine and music with Tim doing most of the hands on cooking, and this,

Five Minute Friday With Lisa Jo Baker.

Cheers.

 

 

Advertisements

One thought on “MESS_five minute friday

  1. Soon enough those girls will be grown and the mess will be gone and you’ll be longing for the days of the mess because it’ll mean you aren’t alone. But I believe you’ve already figured that out. I know I did. It drove my mother crazy that I didn’t demand the ritual saturday clean the house from top to bottom routine she demanded of me. She just didn’t get that Saturdays were meant to be spent having fun with her kids. You go girl!

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s