give thanks

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Last night I dropped my homemade chocolate cream cheese pumpkin torte-all over the inside of the the stove.

After picking up the upside down pan I slammed it down in frustration and it shattered.

I did not tuck the kids in on Thanksgiving Eve.

I yelled.

Thanksgiving morning loomed.

The day of thanks.

I feel heavy.

Regret weighs you down more than second helpings of Thanksgiving dinner.

Day of Thanks.

How do you do what you know you should do, when you feel stuck?

It's easier to stay bundled and sinking in flannel; chasing your thoughts in a downward spiral of thought.

But what if you look out the window and see?


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blue skies stretching over powdering topping clouds


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a neighbor's smoke stack curling up through naked pod- strewn branches


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the wind changes and the morning clouds bunch up like mash potatoes up grandma's china plate

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I walk downstairs and The Babe is standing over the piano playing her new piano piece with a Santa cap on


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cheery sun rays slice through frosty front yards and chippy white pickets

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Pausing, seeing, soaking… it lightens.

It creates a space.

That space dams up myself.

And thanksgiving fills.

Life is filled with good, beautiful, still things

among a lot of hard, ugly, chaotic things.

The truth of this makes me grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Cheers.


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